025: only pink and smoked salmon where she feed her cat

Here is a wee one.

As I've been living in culinary Siberia, I have to forage for nuts and berries a lot. Often, I chew the bark off indigenous trees or suck worms out of the lush soil.
The other day, I took a look around and noticed my forest had turned into a barren wasteland. All around were strip malls, catholic schools, senior homes and coffee shops. Scorned, I had no choice but to patronize a local sushi joint.

The lunch special was $10. No joke. What the fuck does the not-special cost?

This picture serves two purposes:
1) Documenting disappointment and heartbreak
2) Reminding me to buy a new needle cartridge for my record player


Could the nigiri be ANY smaller? The cuts of fish were nearly smaller than my thumbs. and I have pretty miniature hands. :(


This miso soup slayed me with its lack of tofu and seaweed. So bummed.


Dear $10, where did our love go?

024: the glock i hold will blow your ass away

Went for a quiet dinner with my parents. I don't have any witty anecdotes to serve up with this. Let's just say that whenever a restaurant dims the lights for mood, I get really bummed because it means shit pictures like these here.

Crab cakes with portobello, brie, salad and shit.


Lamb with a bunch of fancy vegs.


Linguine with a bunch of seafood and rose sauce. The windfall of cheese is covering the gargantuan shrimp. Really, I've almost never seen shrimps that big! (that's what she said)


A salmon encrusted with something and some really nom-able taters.


And is there anything as depressing as going to your parents house and seeing your former room mid-destruction? They ripped up the old floor, are about to prime over the gothy walls and will probably even repaint the radiator (why I sprayed bits of it blue and green, only art school knows).


Bummer.

023: why you ramble, noone knows

Ain't nothing like a brunch thang after a night of beerz & bikez, so we hit up Kos in the market with Mansa and friends. One of those mornings where you can barely talk and you just wanna keep your head down until you've had a cup of tea and some toast. Thankfully that wasn't all.
I got some tasty eggys florry and was stoked. Actually, the whole table seemed pretty content.

Oh tea, all I want is you.



Food started to arrive...



Look who showed up!


Hey. Let's ride.


Breakfast of Champions


Watermelon vs. Greasy hair. GO!


Mansa was my hero all morning. I saw her down at least 4 caesers while we were there. And we showed up late! At this moment, everyone is laughing because she just told us about her childhood friend Jill who lost all her hair in grade 3 and would rock out to L'il Kim in her fluffy pink bedroom. Why wasn't I friends with Jill? Damn.


***

On another note, here's my favourite Jew. I was singing along to his songs before I could tell time.


Go Tom, way to be eternally relevant!
Bai.

022: Zedong Thought

I was ready to go all Columbine on Friday, but that ended up not happening. Instead, Steph and I linked up, rolled by a few art gallery parties and a house party. Leather jackets and bikes.
Actually, I got hit in the leg by a skateboard on the run and looked like a total ass. No boys would talk to me. It was sad times.

So, biking down Queen St. past CAMH, passing the can of PBR... a new sport is born. Hipster relay.

wooowo cold beer

After party #3 (5 for some), Steph, Britt and I need to mash back some Chinese food. Lucky Dragon gets hit up and we bitches get fed.

Hot, Sour and Delicious.




This was the first dish to arrive. It was lemon-chicken style tofu or something. Best thing I could taste at 2am.


This one was the Vegetarian Delight. I'm usually a big garlic fangirl but I couldn't handle this. It remained largely uneaten, save for the baby corn.


Hoff closing in on the Vegetarian Goose. Who names this shit? It was blantantly not a goose, just little cubes dressed a la General Tao. Mmmmm broccoli.


Closer?


Dow reaching in for the goose. Gooses! Geeses! I want my geese to lay gold eggs for Easter!


I have to say, one of the things I like best about Chinese dining is how it applies Maoist principals. Maybe I'm completely off base here, but have you ever seen a group of people get this food and each have a dish to themselves? It would be so wrong! They bring out the commie in everyone and its a magical thing.


Also, Dow chugging Hot&Sour was hilarity.

"I CAN'T EVEN SEE RIGHT NOW."

021: oh baby i like it rawwww

shimmy shimmy ya, shimmy yah shimmy yay,
gimme the rice so I can take it away!

I haven't been to a sushi night in a while (they were a staple of freshman year), so I thought I'd link up with two of my girls and mash Toronto's favourite interpretation of Japanese food. I created a facebook event called Eats, Sushi and Leaves, a bit of a play on a book we're reading for Copywriting. So clever, IKR! The event spiraled out of control and we ended up having a few more people show up.

This is Shavanti. She's never eaten sushi before but dove right in and even had a shmeer of wasabi. What a fucking champ, eh?


Sweet potato tempura, you tease.


Katie '89 is not amused by Gabe's sashimi. Bitch got chicken.


Dr. Caligari reps the calimari


The lone bearded wolf in the corner. Such is the life.


A handroll set showed up for me. Yesssss


Biggest salmon fan, right here.


I tried to teach Jenn to use chopsticks (I'm a great teacher btw) but control was lost and this one fell in the tempura sauce. Tragedy swept the table. The levees broke and soy sauce flooded the restaurant. Diners were standing on their tables, gesturing through the torn off roof to circling helicopters. It was Katrina all over again. We knew Shavanti was a goner.
Jenn tossed her abhorred chopsticks and picked this thing up with her hands. The clouds parted. Doves sang. The dynamite roll slithered into her belly where it belonged and everyone clapped.


World's roundest bite strikes again, razoring through seaweed!


Free green tea ice cream. I love this place.


Wu tang loves green tea.

020: my popsicle it’s so sweetsie

Dobry den frenz,

I've been busy putting all that hard-earned money from filing to use at university. Textbooks need to be secured, fancy art supplies, TTC tokens a-plenty and boatloads of energy drink. There are tons of cute boys hanging around campus, everyone is making new friends and the weather is still lovely warm. I was getting antsy about not updating Green Blogs and Ham in a while, but I haven't had my camera around much and cameraphone pics of food leave something to be desired. As you can see, I'm not suffering, though my overall quality of life has been severely diminished by synthetic eats.

One of the perks of not living with parents is the extra effort they put into meals when you swing by for a visit. This was from one of two pizzas my dad made when I was over there. I got to take some home. mmmm


Behold a stirfry procured from the cafeteria a couple evenings ago. A first-year asked me to feed him a bite while I "talked dirty" to him. I can't say I played along, apart from nearly choking him with a steaming carrot.


Some tasteful decor in my flat...


All-nighter study sustenance.


Shared these with a friend. I'm vehemently against process chz but will make exceptions like: free grilled cheese sandwich.


This looks pretty fucking disgusting but alas, it isn't. Allow me to explain. There's a Jamaican jerk chicken place in the Upper Beaches called Cool Runnings which is probably my father's favourite place in the world. The rice (which has a hint of coconut) and slaw are delicious too. I was feeling sickly today and my parents brought this over for me. I guess I'm eating chicken again, eh!



On another note, we were at Jenny's last night for a porch party and she drunkenly handed off this lovely ceramic swan to me. My question for the evening is, how should I fill the swan?

019: and if you don't know, now you know

Urban legend tells of a student who subsisted only on Kraft Dinner and came down with the first known case of scurvy in over a century. Out of my combined loves for mac and preposterous scenarios, I'd like to believe it's validity. Raised by a tribe of strict yogis, I have a minor fear of additives (though an inherent ramen fetish).
I now present you with my first edition of Student Feeding.

First cafeteria meal, we realize the man behind the sandwich counter has in fact NEVER assembled a sandwich in his life. Anyone knows that the cheese goes on before the fillings. TRAUMA!

And look at that vile hotdog bun who was cast as the lead; "Bread"


My wrap looks like an interesting homicide case. Also, the salad bar is good for laffs.


The next day, I decided to just pick up some greens and add my own shit from the fridge. success!


Soon, we remembered that food downtown is cheaper and tastier

mmmmm

Here is a cafeteria breakfast of mine (i have not yet subjected the "potatoes" to a photoshoot)

(yes these two are cameraphone shots. you know you love me)

and my friend's uncooked waffle.


My dear madre brought me one of those frozen PC dinners En Papillotte. This is how it looked&tasted: Boring but not inedible.


Looks gross eh?

Smoked oysters & swiss on some sort of bagel cracker. Word. The plate was on my bed and I accidentally sat on them, so I had to fix some more. I guess my cheap mondays can finally go in the wash.