018: flying guillotines and chicken balls

On the first day of school, after helping me move a few small boxes of personal effects and hooking up my sound system, my parents offered to take my roommate and I out for dinner, aware we'll soon be fully malnourished and leprositic. The task of finding a place to eat came largely down to the rolls of thunder emanating from my dad's stomach, so we headed to culinary triumph, The Mandarin!

As you know from my 'Murrica posts, I'm not the fondest of buffets. They usually serve as casting halls for the area's most lethargic and thrify (a good combination of qualities I'd probably utilize if I were to post a personal ad) and the food is usually inedible. Who cares, this was fun!

Venturing into the belly of the beast


Want some salad with your shrimp?


I love how committed Asian restaurants are to having random food sculptures. Just a nice beet and onion rosette among the salmon.


Look at all those king crab legs!! How do they stay in business?


Obviously, this booth caught the eyes of Katie and I.


These sushi wenches seem sweet and innocent but they're really talking about how they'll decapitate any one-armed man roaming these parts.


Sup really weak mojito


Oh hai closeup (yes, I know the deviled egg is really laughable. but how often does one who isn't on the Connecticut social circuit get to eat the things, really?)


We went back for a new assortment after, though it would be pretty unclassy of me to post multiple plates of food.
Then we toured the dessert section and I said "fuck cake".




I settled on those strawbs reflected on top near the right.


Obviously there were fortune cookies but they all said "you will be contented" or some bullshit.
I'd prefer the prophetic "you will die of causes related to gluttony", though the fact that Katie's cookie was an empty shell was pretty offensive in itself...